(Alia bhatt special) whatsapp messages....!!


Alia Bhatt - Safola oil toh de diya bhaiya. Is kee sath ka gift nahi diya.

Shopkeeper -  Isske sath koyi gift nahi hai.

Alia - Ullu matt banao isme likha hai "Cholesterol Free"                   
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Varun - How many apples can you eat on an empty stomach?

Aliya - I can eat 6 apples.

Varun - Wrong. you can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach bcoz when you eat the 2nd apple that’s not an empty stomach!

Aliya: Wow superb joke. I’ll tell my friend..

Aliya to Shraddha - How many apples you can eat on an empty stomach?

Shraddha - I can eat 10.

Aliya - Pagal.. 6 bolti to mast joke sunati!! 
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Alia Bhatt calls the Help Desk to complain a computer problem.

Alia - When I type computer password, it just shows star star star star. What's the problem?

Help Desk - Dear lady, those stars are to protect you, so that if a person is standing behind, he can't read your password.

Alia - Yeah, but stars appear even when there is no one standing behind me.

Help Desk - 

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First time in the history it has happened....!

Rajnikant vs Alia.

Question to both in a competition.

What is half of 8?

Rajni: 4

Alia: Depend karta hai ....

agar horizontally half karo to ''0'' or vertically karo to ''3''

 Rajnikant still unconcious...!!!
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Alia bhatt: Hey dad, what plans for weekend ?

Mahesh bhatt: Income Tax Returns.
      
Alia bhatt: Hey first part kab release hua tha?

Mahesh bhatt:  Jaa meri ma, tu shooting pe ja!!!


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100 metre ki race ho rahi thi...

Referee said '1,2,3 GO!'...

Everybody started running except Alia bhatt.

Referee - Y r u not running...?

Alia - My number is 4.


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SBI Bank: Humara bank aapko bina interest ke loan de raha hai....

Alia bhat: Agar dene mein interest hi nahi hai to kyu de rahe ho? Nahi chahiye....


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Once there was a mirror that killed anyone who lied...

FRENCH : I think I dont smoke (died).

AMERICAN : I think I love my wife (died).

ALIA BHATT: I think.. (died)


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Alia bhatt and varun dhawan are walking on a road, and they find a 1000 rupee note lying down.

Alia - What should we do now?

Varun- We'll take 50:50.

Alia- What about the remaining 900?

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Alia Bhatt: Let's go for movie.
Varun: Shit, I've got a doctor's appointment today..

Alia Bhatt: Just cancel it,Tell him you're sick.


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Alia reading newspaper..

News:
"Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump"

Aalia comments:
Idiot !!
Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping!!!

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Deepika Padukone : I have more Fans than You..

Alia Bhatt: No Big deal, I have AC at Home. 
Its new in market forward it

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आज की हकीकत...

पहले दो लोग लड़ते झगड़ते
तो तीसरा छुड़वाने जाता था
आज तीसरा video बनाने लगता है

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दो बच्चों की मां तीसरी शादी कर रही थी.

फेरो के टाइम एक बच्चा रोने लगा.

मां का जवाब सुंन कर दूलहा बेहोश हो गया.

मां बोली .... चुप हो जा !! वर्ना अगली बार नही लाउंगी !!!!

Good morning folks......!!!!